spf40

Would you patronize or even consider a swingers club run by a single male? What about a single female? What if the single male or female did not play...just ran the club?

So far we have avoided being outted by either people we know or anything left on our computer. It will probably happen, but I'd like to know what mistakes people make and how to avoid the same mistakes. Any suggestions?

How many of you have arranged a private first meet with a couple you met through an ad site, and once at the meeting place the "couple" doesn't arrive, instead, only one of them shows? The person may have given you a reason like, "my spouse was called into work at the last minute" or some such thing. How did you handle the surprise of seeing only one of them show? Did you believe the person's reason? Did you later meet both of them at another time? We haven't had this happen, but if we did, we'd be stunned, suspicious, and would proceed cautiously. Depending on what the person continued to say and how they acted, we might be out of there in 5 minutes, never wanting anything to do with the "couple" again. But then...maybe things can go well in these cases? We always exchange cell phone numbers before a private meet, so in a situation like this we'd expect a call as soon as their plans changed, this way we would be given the courtesy to know what's up ahead of time and set a new meet date if we preferred.

We have starting playing with a couple that we are now also starting to build a friendship with. Something that has crossed my mind now that the friendship is building is whether to tell my close friends (two people I am extremely close with, one who is like a brother) what we are doing. I am thinking that if we start having our swinging friends involved in our social circle that eventually it's going to come out, either by some slip of the tongue or by people picking up on the vibe between the four of us. Something is inevitable I am sure. Either I can deal with it when it comes up (if it comes up) or I can tell the people I am close to now and get it over with. Part of me wants to share it with them because I am not ashamed of what we're doing and I'd really love to be open with them rather than telling white lies (about where we met etc.), but I sure do not want to lose those friendships. One concern for me is that those friends may not be as discrete as I think they would be. Having it get out to all of our other friends who are not as close wouldn't be something I'm happy with at all. Which leaves me feeling like it would be better to keep this to ourselves and deal with someone finding out if it does happen. Although that is too bad because I'd truly love to be able to share this openly with them like we do the rest of our lives. Thanks in advance for any insight and advice you may be able to impart